chicagoan
01-06-2006, 01:53 AM
JANUARY 3, 2006. The following conversation took place in the Oval Office---
Q: Mr. President, it's definite. They know NSA has been spying on Americans. And they know you think it's a good idea.
A: Who cares? I'm on the warpath.
Q: We have to do something.
A: I'll tell them the war requires extreme measures to protect the freedoms we hold so---
Q: They've heard that speech before.
A: So what? God has talked to me many times.
Q: Are we going to investigate NSA?
A: Are you crazy? That would stir up a shitpot of ill repute.
Q: What?
A: You know what I mean.
Q: We have to investigate.
A: Yes, but the question is who?
Q: Excuse me?
A: Who do we investigate?
Q: Well---
A: There was a leak.
Q: Which one are you talking about?
A: Do I have to do all the work?
Q: We could...let see, we could launch a probe into who leaked the fact that NSA has been spying on Americans.
A: Run that by me again?
Q: We ask, who let everybody know that NSA has been spying on Americans?
A: Yeah?
Q: We cover a crime by inventing a new one.
A: And that would work?
Q: It could. Instead of admitting NSA committed a crime, we say the crime was telling everyone that NSA was committing a crime.
A: Only we don't say it that way.
Q: Yeah.
A: Sounds okay to me.
Q: This discussion you and I are having? It never happened. Otherwise, you and I could be accused of conspiring to commit a crime about committing a crime about committing a crime. I think that's right.
A: Whatever. Get on it. Tell Cheney.
Q: I am Cheney.
A: Well, good then.
JON RAPPOPORT www.nomorefakenews.com
Q: Mr. President, it's definite. They know NSA has been spying on Americans. And they know you think it's a good idea.
A: Who cares? I'm on the warpath.
Q: We have to do something.
A: I'll tell them the war requires extreme measures to protect the freedoms we hold so---
Q: They've heard that speech before.
A: So what? God has talked to me many times.
Q: Are we going to investigate NSA?
A: Are you crazy? That would stir up a shitpot of ill repute.
Q: What?
A: You know what I mean.
Q: We have to investigate.
A: Yes, but the question is who?
Q: Excuse me?
A: Who do we investigate?
Q: Well---
A: There was a leak.
Q: Which one are you talking about?
A: Do I have to do all the work?
Q: We could...let see, we could launch a probe into who leaked the fact that NSA has been spying on Americans.
A: Run that by me again?
Q: We ask, who let everybody know that NSA has been spying on Americans?
A: Yeah?
Q: We cover a crime by inventing a new one.
A: And that would work?
Q: It could. Instead of admitting NSA committed a crime, we say the crime was telling everyone that NSA was committing a crime.
A: Only we don't say it that way.
Q: Yeah.
A: Sounds okay to me.
Q: This discussion you and I are having? It never happened. Otherwise, you and I could be accused of conspiring to commit a crime about committing a crime about committing a crime. I think that's right.
A: Whatever. Get on it. Tell Cheney.
Q: I am Cheney.
A: Well, good then.
JON RAPPOPORT www.nomorefakenews.com